Pay It Forward

So as some of you may know, I have a big place in my heart for those less fortunate.  I always feel like I am no more than 2 steps away from possibly being one of "those people" on any given day.  I'm also the girl that cries during the Feed The Children and SPCA commercials, wishes I could adopt every neglected and abused child and just basically do something to change the world.  But, in a way, I think I am.

My mother grew up homeless.  Her father was an alcoholic and could not keep a job. She has told me stories of growing up in abandoned buildings/bars and how they struggled to eat and stay warm everyday.  Luckily, she was able to break the cycle and escape the lifestyle.  But knowing that my own mother was homeless, makes me want to help others break the cycle.

Through my boss, I found an organization called OurCalling.org.  I met with the guy that actually started the organization one on one.  Each Wednesday, they do what is called a Search and Rescue.  They walk the streets of South Dallas and seek out the homeless.  They give them food, hygiene products and pray with them.  Some of the stories he told me of people he has encountered and what they go through are horrific.  It's insane that these things are going on 30 minutes from my house.  Women on the streets giving up there body for $3 to pay for their addiction (actual lines forming behind a liquor store with a cardboard sign that says $3 as men take their turn),  homeless men raping homeless women daily, the violence, the hopelessness, the feeling of being trash because they live by it.  Did you know there are 30,000 homeless in Dallas and the shelters only hold 1800 beds?  They have no other choice but to live under bridges and overpasses.

So after speaking to him, I was more than excited to embark on one of the most intense service projects I have ever done.  We hit the streets around 9 am.  I rode in a van with a few other homeless guys that were in the process of turning their lives around.  They told me their stories.  Most of them had started using drugs, gotten arrested, and the felony on their record has prevented them from any type of employment with the way the job market is right now.  I met one lady that owned her own company, lost her job, got evicted, car was repossessed, became homeless and now she can't get an apartment or a car due to her credit so she has been homeless for over 8 months.  No family to turn to doesn't help either.

Once we got to some of the bridges and the streets of South Dallas, we hopped out of the car, grabbed some bags of food and just started walking.  It was amazing.  People just came out of no where.  They recognized the OurCalling van and walked up to us.  Some were sleeping on couches in the middle of fields, in refrigerator boxes under bridges, bus stop benches...it was surreal.  This is really going on 30 minutes from my house.  We actually went to a real "crack house."  There we about 10 individuals inside an abandoned house, sitting on the ground, smoking dope and shooting up.  We had to send a guy in there to tell them we were here so they would come out because it was too dangerous for us to go inside.  Across the street, was what one of the guys referred to as a "dope yard."  It's an open wooded area where several homeless gather and just get high all day, and then they sleep there at night.

Now some of you are thinking in your head right now that these people need to just get off the drugs, go to a shelter, shower, fill out some applications and find a job, right?  I thought that way too.  We have all said, "I see NOW HIRING signs at gas stations, McDonalds, etc." Well, if it were that easy, there wouldn't be 30,000 homeless in Dallas.  Having a felony on your record can almost immediately eliminate you from consideration of a any job with the unemployment rate at 9.8%.  McDonalds will not hire you if you have a felony.  How do you fill out an application with no permanent residence or a phone number for them to contact you at for an interview?  A drug addiction is not something someone can break without help, and sometimes it takes medical help to truly overcome it.  How many homeless people do you know with a healthcare plan?  There is not enough room in the shelters for these people to go to. 30,000 homeless and 1800 beds in Dallas shelters. Where do the other 28, 200 stay at night? 

So what do we do?  How do we change this?  We pay it forward.

Here's my "I'm just a normal person that cares" answer:  Obviously, we need more organizations and more funding to help people get out of bad situations.  I know OurCalling is always in desperate need of funding to help out with feeding the homeless, giving them hygiene products, providing them with life skills classes, etc.  You may not have the monetary means to help in these situations, but you can definitely help join forces and contribute to make an impact.  Companies can make charitable donations - its a HUGE tax write off.  Why wouldn't they?  Have you ever asked your company to help an organization within your community?   Look at it this way -   Your company profits from the community, therefore they should give back as well.  That's my company's stand point, and its one of the few things I love about my job.   

From my standpoint, it all starts from within.  Once you can make that homeless person, that has to sleep by trash at night not feel like trash, they will become motivated...and do whatever it takes to get out of the cycle.  Motivation is what makes us all do what we do.  My child motivates me to be a better person, to go to work everyday, to pursue my goals so I can provide him with a better life.  You can be that motivator for a homeless person. I know for some of the people that I have dealt with personally, all it took was someone to listen to them, to pray with them and to give them that little push.

There are a lot of prideful homeless people that do not want to reach out to family and ask for help. Let me tell you something - Pride is one of the seven deadly sins for a reason.  It can kill you, and it will.  Who gives a flying eff about pride when you are freezing to death under a bridge and your stomach is growling because you haven't eaten in 4 days?  I have a lot of pride too, but I also realize that sometimes I need help and that's where family and friends come into play.  So for 50% of the homeless I meet, I do not preach to them about about God (although I do pray with them and continue to after I have met them).  I talk to them, see if they have any type of family or friends that can help.  Some say yes, but they don't want them to know that they are homeless or they're embarrassed, or they know that their family wouldn't care anyway.  That's when I pull out my cell phone and put it in there face and say -"So the next call you want your mother/children/siblings to receive is that you were found dead under a bridge? Let's call them right now."  Sometimes it works, and sometimes its doesn't.  I will never stop trying though.

The one thing I wish people would understand is - The homeless are just like you and me.  Some of them may have even been better off than you or I at some point and due to unfortunate circumstances, fell into this lifestyle.  Don't be afraid to shake their hand or start a conversation.  Human contact is so important for the soul.  I'm not a touchy person, but I always shake their hand, introduce myself, put my hand on their shoulder while talking to them and hug them when I say goodbye.  And 99% of the time, I remember their name.  I have seen several of them on different occasions and they are shocked when I walk up to them and say "Hey Jimmy!"  When they ask how I remembered their name, I tell them - "Because you made an impact on my life."  

Finally, I know its the holidays and people feel a greater urge to give, but people need help year round.  Don't forget how fortunate you truly are.  If you are able to read this blog, you probably have internet access, clothing, and a warm place to be.  That's more than 30,000 other people in Dallas have right now.

Everyday that you wake up, you have an opportunity to make a difference.  So pay it forward.